Monthly Archives: March 2010

Don’t Be A Louis

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Posted by L. Wood Kellogg on 03/26/2010 – 11:15am
Filed under: Feature, Local College  

I know you have been anxiously waiting.  I know this.  I have been waiting too.  I just didn’t know what to do after the Jayhawks got Pantherized last Saturday.  I promise I won’t dwell on this.

I blame this entirely on the three douchebags who played darts for 6 hours at the Sports Attic.  Because they were doing that, HP and I were unable to sit in our seats.  We were forced instead to sit in the less reliable section.*  It just didn’t work.  I tried to will Kansas to victory.  HP gave it his best effort.  My wonderful fiancée continued sending positive vibes via the text line to us at the Attic (and she’s a Mizzou fan, God love her).  Down 10 with 10 or so to go, we thought the tides had turned for the better.  Hall and Oates came on the speakers, and we danced. 

*If you ever make it to the Sports Attic, go to the back two tables. The one on the left is the one that HP knocked over jubilantly after Mario’s Miracle.  So we have won some games there, but we have also not exactly played our A-game at times as well.

I’ll say that again.  HP and I danced like morons to Hall and Oates’ “You Make My Dreams Come True”.   Feel free to click here, and enjoy while you finish this column.

We had to do something to change the momentum.  And it sort of did.  KU went on their mini-run after that.  Apparently, Hall and Oates inspires finally using a full court press to speed the game up.  But alas, it wasn’t enough.

So here I sit, on my couch with my computer.  $170 worth of St. Louis regional finals tickets on the table, Bellwether and his parents in a car somewhere between KC and Columbia, and no Jayhawks to watch.  Oh well, at least we’ll have beer.

Now, that is all I am going to say about KU until next fall.  I have gone through all the stages of grief finally settling somewhere between “Depression” and “Acceptance”, and that is where I am going to stay until the tournament is actually over.  Then and only then will I move permanently into “Depression” just in time for Royals baseball.

No, I want to talk about something else.  My most hated “Facebook Friend”. 

Louis.

I will withhold the last name, not because I think he will read this, but because the KCSP legal department has advised me to do so.*

*The KCSP legal department is located just down the hall from my office here at headquarters, and consists entirely of D-Lee watching old episodes of Ally McBeal

Louis is the worst sports fan…ever.

There, I said it.  This is the guy who for some reason is the biggest fan of the most hated teams in the world for absolutely NO REASON.  Louis was born and raised in Iowa.  He still lives there.  He will never leave there.  And here are his teams…

Yankees

Lakers

Kentucky Basketball

USC Football

And a recent addition this past season was the Saints.

How do you justify being that big of an asshole???  Look, I am not saying that you cannot like whoever you want to like…wait…yes I am!  You have to have legitimate reasons for liking your teams.  Here are the legitimate reasons in order: 

  1. It’s where you were born – I was born in KC, therefore I have a right (and an obligation, quite frankly) to root for the Royals, Chiefs, and Jayhawks.
  2. You lived in the town at some point, but didn’t already have an allegiance to a team in that particular sport – If and when I ever take the time to give a shit about the NBA, I root for the Indiana Pacers.  I lived in Indianapolis, and did not have a basketball team from KC.  Therefore I am allowed to grab the Pacers.  (God all my teams suck).
  3. You went to the college – Here is where you get some gray areas.  I didn’t go to KU, but I am covered on them in rule #1.  I do root for Drake, but in the event that KU and Drake ever meet for a national title, I will stick with KU because they were there first.  I will also stab my testicles with sharp objects.
  4. You swap allegiances because you now own season tickets – I lived in Detroit for a while.  The Red Wings became my hockey team because it was the first time I lived in a town with a hockey team per rule #2.  However, when I moved to Minnesota, and the NHL announced an expansion team for St. Paul, we bought (and still own) season tickets to the Wild.  Therefore I can claim the Wild as my team, and renounce the Wings.  However, you must renounce your former team completely.  None of this “Well, I like the Wild.  But they aren’t very good, so I will root for the Wings in the playoffs”.  It’s all or nothing.
  5. You have a religious affiliation (The Notre Dame Rule) – If you are Catholic, have ever been Catholic, or have a Catholic grandfather, you can like Notre Dame.

That’s it.  Those are the rules.  So I don’t want to see status updates from Louis saying, “Kentcuky showing why it’s the shiznit.  Go Cats”.  That is an actual post from Louis last night.  I don’t want to hear it from any of you unless you can apply the above rules first. 

Don’t be a Louis. 

Who says shiznit, by the way???  That’s more dated than Hall and Oates.

Therapy Thru Blogging

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Posted by Bellwether Johnson on 03/20/2010 – 8:30pm
Filed under: Podcasts  

I have a history with the University of Northern Iowa.  First off, I live in Iowa, but running into Panther fans is not a regular occurrence.  This state is plastered with Tigerhawks, and occasionally, you’ll get a Cyclone here and there, but the only time you ever come a cross a Panther is when someone is either mentioning Kurt Warner, or…well, that’s it.  Today I went to the bar where I witnessed Kansas’ triumph over North Carolina in the Final Four two years ago…needless to say, the “UNI” fans came out of the woodwork…

I know a few UNI grads.  A couple of my buddies played on the UNI baseball team.  I have a friend who went there for a year before transferring to the school that I went to, a charming private school nestled in the ghetto of Des Moines, IA called Drake University.  The arena there is called the Knapp Center.  This is where I have had most of my contact with the Panthers.  In 2007, I was there when, after beating Iowa and Iowa State earlier in the year, Drake won bragging rights for the state by beating UNI, and the students rushed the court.

In 2009, Drake was coming off an improbable Missouri Valley Conference regular season and tournament Championship.  My UNI buddies and I decided to take in the matchup between our alma maters in Des Moines.  Drake had lost several cogs from their 2008 run: their best sharpshooter in Klayton Korver, their head coach Keno Davis, and the MVC Player of the Year Adam Emmenecker.  UNI smoked them by 35.

I didn’t really mind that much.  I have been rooting for KU since I was a kid.  Drake, I didn’t really know until I went there, and they had always sucked.  Always.  So, losing to UNI was no big surprise.  But there is one thing that pissed me off.  There was this middle-aged Panther fan sitting about five rows behind us who knew everybody — EVERYBODY — on the UNI team, and would SHOUT about EVERYTHING going on in the game…even after they were up by freaking forty.  But the one player I remember him busting a nut over the most was freaking Ali Farokmanseh.  He was a sophomore at the time, and everytime that fucker hit a three (he hit about a dozen that game), #1 UNI fan would shout, “THREEEEE ALIIIIIII!!!!!!!”  What a fucking toolbox.  My buddy Scottie leaned to me during the game and said, “(I bet that guy beats his wife).”  I can only hope she returned the favor by shooting him in the fucking face with a sawed-off shotgun.

Not that I’m bitter or anything.

Any KU fan could see this coming from a mile away.  We did it to ourselves as a #1 seed in 1992 and 1998.  We lost in the first round two years-in-a-row.  I knew exactly how a loss to UNI would play out.  We would miss a few early easy buckets.  UNI would hit over 50% in the first half.  Sherron Collins would be shaky.  UNI’s D would force turnovers.  The worst-case scenario played itself out exactly like we have seen before.

I still to this day question how a team like Kansas can come out as flat as they do in games like these.  Sure, they can get themselves up to beat K-State decisively three times this season, but can always underestimate an opponent like UNI.  Why??  How can you underestimate them??  They are the MVC regular season and tournament champions.  If we had played with the same intensity that we did in the last ten minutes the entire game, we would have strolled by 20…easily.

And to Bill Self, why has full court pressure been so underutilized this season??  We certainly had the bodies to do it.  *sigh*  I’m nitpicking here.  When KU pulled within three in the waning seconds of the game, a UNI fan sitting behind be said, “Kansas doesn’t deserve to win this game.”  I turned to him, he knowing that I was rooting for KU, and said, “You know what??  You’re right.”  You might live by the William Munny parlance that “Deserve’s got nuthin’ to do with it.”  Well it does and it doesn’t.  You can’t play like an asshole for 35 minutes and expect to pull it out.

So, this is the reason why I don’t’ go gambling: Me, Logg and HP now have $600 worth of tickets to the Midwest Regional Final in St. Louis that we bought last May…and no team to root for.

My buddy Gio texted me after the game:

“This upset is like Heidi Montag stealing a part from Meryl Streep to portray an english aristocrat…Literally.”

I don’t know about that.  UNI is a good team…and they deserved to win.

Congratulations.

And Fuck Your Mother.

Logg’s Going Live

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Posted by L. Wood Kellogg on 03/19/2010 – 11:10am
Filed under: Feature, Local College  

Since I have the day off, I figured what the hell.  Check in if you’re at work, watching the games, have nothing better to do, etc.

Boo ya!

Episode 13: 03/16

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Posted by KCSportsPodcast.com on 03/18/2010 – 12:11am
Filed under: Podcasts  

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Conor Jay joins KCSportsPodcast.com’s lead contributors, L. Wood Kellogg and Bellwether Johnson, to give you insight on the not-so-popular games for the 2010 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament.

Calm The F Down

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Posted by L. Wood Kellogg on 03/15/2010 – 11:44am
Filed under: Local College  

Well, that didn’t take long.  The KU alarmists are out in force. 

“Just look at the Midwest!  KU got screwed!!!

“How are we the number one overall seed, and get stuck with that bracket”

Or, if you like Whitlock’s take…

“The NCAA is a giant conspiracy that loves Duke.”

Are you serious Jason??  Did you even let your editors read what you wrote this morning???  They can’t have.  There is no way that they would have allowed you to write a piece of shit like that, which essentially accuses the NCAA of intentionally moving Duke to an “easy” bracket because they are “ratings gold”.  You honestly believe that???  Please note: Whitlock also believes that the NCAA kidnapped the Lindbergh baby, faked 9-11, and killed JFK.

Here is an estimation of the S-Curve from the NCAA.

Add the rankings of the top 4 seeds in each bracket.  Here is what you get:

West – 44

South – 39

East – 35

Midwest – 35

So what would you do to balance it out?  Switch Maryland with Vanderbilt?  You’re splitting hairs there.

Look, I understand the initial knee-jerk reaction.  The Jayhawks will play in a Midwest region with the likes of Ohio State (2), Georgetown (3), Maryland (4), Michigan State (5), and Tennessee (6).    Throw in a little Okie Light and some Northern Iowa, and yeah, you have a tough road to the final four.

But it’s supposed to be tough.  It for a national championship!

At first glance I can see where people are getting their sense of trepidation from.  But are we really afraid of these teams?  I think not.  We are afraid of the names.

Let’s look at a few things…

Assuming a first round win*, the likely next opponent is Northern Iowa.  Northern Iowa won the MVC, which while I appreciate the feat, is not exactly a power conference.  They lost to DePaul on a neutral court.  My dog can beat DePaul on a neutral court.

*I honestly believe I know people that would take their own life if KU lost that game to Lehigh.  I may or may not be one of them.

Then we likely have Maryland (who was ousted in their first game of the ACC tournament) or Michigan State (who lost to Minnesota, and suspended a starter).  What is so scary about those actual teams? 

And then here is the part that I think people are overlooking.  Of Ohio State, Oklahoma State, Tennessee, Georgia Tech, and Georgetown; KU only has to play one of them!  That’s right; they’re in the same bracket, but they (and there’s no way of getting around it) have to play each other first! 

Yes, they’re good teams, but what did you want?  That game is for a trip to the Final Four.  You’ll be down to only eight teams in the whole thing.  They are all going to be good. 

Still think I am wrong?  Prove it.  Sign up, and take KU down in the sweet 16.  I dare you.

So while I agree that this isn’t going to be a cake-walk for KU, I also don’t think it’s an impossible climb.  That is, unless the president of Lehigh decides to change the name of the school to “Blehigh”.

Then I would be worried.

***Still panicked?  Think I missed something? Let me know at lwood@kcsportspodcast.com***

6th Annual March Madness Pool

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Posted by Conor Jay on 03/11/2010 – 10:02am
Filed under: Feature  

Registration Steps:

  1. Login/Register at Facebook.com.
  2. Add the Facebook application CBSSports.com Brackets.
  3. Join the 6th Annual March Madness Pool [KCSportsPodcast.com] with your account.
  4. Submit your Tournament Bracket before 10:50 AM CT,  March 18th.
  5. [OPTIONAL] Bet $10.00 via PayPal.com before the Tournament Bracket deadline. 

Notes:

  • The Magic Number is the sum of members bets and will be updated here.
  • 1st Place will receive 100% of the pool and be a guest on the KC Sports Podcast.
  • Only paid members (see 5), may win the pool. Other members can play for recreation.
  • Rules and scoring are available here: http://apps.facebook.com/cbssports/rules.

Questions?
Please reply to this post.

Listen To Me; I Am An Expert

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Posted by L. Wood Kellogg on 03/09/2010 – 4:06pm
Filed under: Feature, Local College  

It’s baaaaack.  Yup, March Madness is fully upon us.  The Tim Horton’s Brier Curling Cup competition started Saturday. 

Did you see Manitoba just flatten Prince Edward Island?  Oh, you didn’t?  Me neither.  I was too busy immersing myself completely in college basketball hysteria.  Here is how excited I am; pretend this guy is me, and the fire is college basketball.  Get the idea?

As a KU fan, tomorrow begins my second favorite part of the season.  The Big XII tournament.  I figured that since I am the official KCSportsPodcast college basketball guru, you all would appreciate my opinion on what’s going to happen over the next four days in Kansas City.

Plus, do you really want to read anymore about the Royals?  I thought so.

So here we go with my predictions on how everyone will do starting with the worst teams, and going to the winner.

The “If they are getting rid of gift baskets, then why are we going?” Group.

Oklahoma 13-17 (4-12):

Why they can win: They can’t.  This season has been a disaster for Boomer.  This team’s fans are just waiting for football season.  That’s it.

Why they will lose:  I don’t know.  Because they aren’t very good at basketball.

Where will they finish: Lose in the first round to Oklahoma State by 20.

Nebraska 14-17 (2-14):

Why they can win: They also cannot.  The only thing they might win is the “Guy with the longest name” award.

Why they will lose: Because that same guy just looks too much like Scott Baio. 

Where they will finish: Lose in the first round to Missouri by 10.

The “Let’s piss someone’s fans off and win a game we shouldn’t” Group

Iowa State 15-16 (4-12):

Why they can win: Ask Kansas State.  They are athletic.  Craig Brackens would be all Big XII if he was surrounded with anything, and Gilstrap can play.  Plus, you gotta’ believe that they are coming in with quite a bit of confidence.

Why they will lose: Along with confidence, a game like that also gives you a lot of mental and physical fatigue

Where they will finish: Quarterfinals

Texas Tech 16-14 (4-12):

Why they can win: They can tie.  Check this stat out.  Texas tech scores on average 76.4 points per game.  They give up 76.4 points per game.  My guess is that they find a way to tie it.   Then they just need one point in OT to win.

Why they will lose: This team was 12-2 coming into conference play, and 4-12 since then.  They kind of a collapse doesn’t happen for no reason.

Where they will finish: Quarterfinals

The “How the hell were we ever ranked #1” Group

Texas 23-8 (9-7):

Why they can win: The talent is there.  People didn’t just guess that this team was good, and rank them #1.  If they can play to their potential, they can win the whole tournament.

Why the will lose: Because they won’t play to their potential.  Plus, I hate Texass. (misspelled on purpose)

Where they will finish:  Well, if you have been following along with your brackets you will notice that I think they will lose in the opening round to Iowa State by 8.

The “You should win the first game, but I would never wager on you” Group

Colorado 15-15 (6-10):

Why they can win: They just beat the Red Raiders by 11 last weekend.  Plus, Alec Burks gets to come and play in his hometown.

Why they will lose: The Buffs are on a three game winning streak.  They haven’t had a four game streak this entire season.

Where they will finish: Lose to Texas Tech in the opening round by 6

The “Teams that are complete wild cards” Group

Oklahoma State 21-9 (9-7):

Why they can win: Two words; James Anderson.  He is the only guy in the tournament with the ability to pick his team up onto his back and carry them to a title.

Why they will lose: Three words; No One Else.  That’s the problem.  If Anderson is off, who is going to pick up the slack?  It is saying something when you have the Big XII player of the year, and yet you barley finished above .500 in the league. 

Where they will finish: Quarterfinals.

The “What do you mean we have a first round bye” Group

Texas A&M 22-8 (11-5):

Why they can win: I personally believe that Turgeon should have been coach of the year.  You look at this team, and you don’t see anything real special.  But they somehow get it done.  They get good guard play from Sloan, and have a solid big man in Bryan Davis.

Why they will lose: This team has not had this kind of success in a while.  They have only had a first round bye three times ever.  Average seeding…8.3.  Too much pressure on the poor Aggies.

Where they will finish: Quarterfinals

Baylor 24-6 (11-5):

Why they can win: LaceDarius Dunn is a star.  As is LaceQuincy Acy and LaceEkpe Udoh.  This team can be LaceScary.

Why they will lose: Again, I think it comes back to experience at this point.  The highest seed Baylor has ever had was a 5, and that’s only happened twice.  Look, just be happy that Tweety Carter hasn’t killed anyone.  What??  Too soon?

Where they will finish: Semi-Finals

The “Dear God, please let this happen” Group

Missouri 22-9 (10-6)

Why they can win: They do have some experience in this tournament being that they won it last season.  The style of play is pretty good for tournament play, as it wears down the opponents.  Plus, there is no way that God would deprive me of yet a third KU beat-down of the Misery.

Why they will lose: All that being said, if the tiggers attempt to build an addition onto the Sprint Center with bricks, they could be back in CoMo before dinner on Wednesday.

Where they will finish: Semi-finals, and it’s gonna’ be the biggest defeat yet.

The “We all knew it would come down to this” Group

Kansas 29-2 (15-1)

Why they can win: because they are the best goddamn team in the whole goddamn country.  You know that.

Why they will lose: KU doesn’t have a lot going for them in this game.  They will have wrapped up the number one overall seed and a trip to St. Louis.  They don’t have anything to prove.

Where they will finish: Let the kitties finally win one, for crying out loud.

Kansas State 24-6 (11-5)

Why they can lose: See what I did there???  Anyway, K-State has some flaws.  We saw that last weekend.  I have some advice for the Cats.  Don’t name your arena if you plan on losing there pretty consistently.  I am having a real tough time backing you up right now.

Why they will win: This is the mf-ing superbowl for State.  It’s in KC, It’s against KU, and everyone is talking about the Cats falling apart against ISU.  Notice how the discussion went from “should K-State get a one seed” to “K-State will be lucky to get a three seed” just like that.  The cats are listening, and Frank Martin is getting angry.  Bellwether just peed a little when he read that.

Where they will finish: Big XII Tournament Champions*

You see what I did there Mizzou fans?  Yeah, you know.

Of course, what the hell do I know?  Scott Baio could get hot, and take the whole thing…

***What are your predictions?  Let us know at lwood@kcsportspodcast.com***

Ignorance is Bliss

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Posted by Bellwether Johnson on 03/05/2010 – 12:36pm
Filed under: Kansas City Royals  

It’s baseball season!!  Isn’t that great!!  Oh…you’re a Royals fan.  Well, then.  Here’s a news flash:

Your team sucks.

No, really.  Your team sucks BAD.  Sorry for the un-sunny disposition, but the moves you’ve made in the off season to this point have been baffling.  Your team has tried to improve by doing the following:

1.) Releasing two serviceable, yet unspectacular catchers in order to sign the worst offensive catcher over the past decade for millions more than you would have owed the two that you released, one being your Cy Young winning pitcher’s favorite target the other one, a cog in the Carlos Beltran deal along with…

2.) …another fan favorite who was traded for two past-prospect age prospects, and in doing so, left your second-best offensive player without a position…

3.) …but that’s all good since he wasn’t that good defensively and you’re in the American League, so you can stash him as the Designated hitter except…

4.) …your moody, over-paid free agent gem from two off-seasons ago – who is still moody and owed more than ten million this year – will probably have to play most of the time at DH, but, like I said he’s moody, and still wants to play in the outfield, which is easier said than done because…

5.) …despite the fact that you have a good number of the same-level players in your minor league system who cost pennies-on-the-dollar compared to who you gave contracts to, you’ve gone ahead and acquired about a half-dozen* outfielders who are either just above, but more likely nowhere near, replacement level, …

* Estimate

6.) …one of whom you’ve promised to give centerfield to despite the fact that he probably has the worst range any of the other potential center-fielders, and who is, by the way, a left-handed power hitter, and will be playing in a home park that is notoriously brutal to left-handed power hitters.

Is that all??  Well, no.  There are untold number of reasons why the Royals will suck this year.  Six doesn’t even skim the surface.  Strangely, the Royals blogosphere, home of some of the best baseball minds in the business, has seemed, unlike in previous years, resigned to this fact.

It’s as if they’re no longer upset at it.  They’ve gone thru the five-stages of Royals fandom, and have finally, excruciatingly, made it to acceptance.  See, the excuse for Allard Baird was always that he didn’t have enough money.  We lucked into having the best young offense in baseball at the turn of the last decade, but didn’t have the resources to keep any of them.

Now that we have (at least some of) the resources, we can firmly press the weight of blame on the shoulders of Dayton Moore.

The guy always seems a day late.  Unfortunately, he’s never a dollar short.  It seems like every time he thinks we need a particular skill on the team, he goes all “Damn the Torpedoes!!” on us and does whatever it takes to solve the problem as he sees fit with little regard for any of the other skills that particular player (doesn’t) possess.

Case in point: Mike Jacobs.  What were we lacking going into last season??  POWER!!  Sure!!  That’s the ticket!!  So what does good ole’ Capn’ Moore do??  Signs Jacobs with little regard to the fact that despite his impressive power numbers, he can’t get on base or hit lefties.  Wow…that seems to be two pretty big holes in your game, especially when you (again) have a good number of the same-level players in your minor league system who cost pennies-on-the-dollar compared to Mike Jacobs.  Sound familiar??

This season, it was speed and defense, which is why we got the outfielders we did…except, none are particularly good at it, and, as said before, we’ve promised the one with the least range center field.  Oh, and none of them can get on base, either…FUN!!

On top of that, we’ve been told all along that we’re building the minor-league system, and while there does seem to be some talent down there, Royals fans will still no doubt continue to be reminded that there are better players that we passed up in the draft who are already making impacts on their major league clubs.

At least this time, they weren’t passed up due to signability…nope, just pure ineptitude.

In years past, this analysis might have seemed a little harsh.  Up until last off-season, Moore’s track record with the Royals seemed to point us back to respectability.  Now??

Yep.  Still in last place.

While writing this, I sent an E-Mail to Logg and Conor Jay, letting them know that the post was upcoming.

Me: “Royals post coming today…”

Logg: “Who are the Royals?”

Sigh…ignorance is bliss…

KU’s loss: Blame Palin

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Posted by L. Wood Kellogg on 03/01/2010 – 12:48pm
Filed under: Local College  

As most of you know, KU fell to the Cowboys on Saturday in a game that was not nearly as close as the score would make it seem.  But I don’t blame the players.  It was out of their hands.

I am not going to talk about KU’s atrocious defense in Stillwater. Nor am I going to talk about KU’s turnovers.   And I am not going to talk about OSU shooting 97% (or whatever it was) from the field. No, the blame for this latest KU loss* falls squarely on one person.

*I say that like there have been so many.

Sarah Palin.

You’re going to have to hang with me on this one. Okay, so everyone knows that many of our government programs stink. I actually watched about 6 hours of the “Health Care Summit” last week. Unfortunately, there was no curling on that day. What I figured out from that informative collection of ideas complete waste of time and money, is that the two parties in Washington cannot even agree what time lunch should be, should they eat in or go out, and what they would like on their pizzas, much less what they can do to fix health care.

I don’t necessarily blame that on them. They are just sticking up for their parties’ platforms. No, the real blame for that is on Barack Obama. He is the president for crying out loud. He has to be the voice of reason that pulls everyone together and says, “Hey McConnell, come on man. And Pelosi, calm down.” He has to bring the sides to the table and get something done. He has failed to do that.

Now, on top of health care, another thing that is completely broken is the education system. How is it that the high school I attended in Minnesota has enough money to build a heated dome for the football team to practice in, yet some schools hardly have enough money to turn the heat on in the classroom? The level of disparity between the haves and have-nots is wider than the space Jon Shuster had to shoot at on four or five potential game winning shots combined.

Something must be done about this. I blame Barry on this one too. For all of his blabbering on about health care reform that, basically, no one wants, he has failed to address the education system at all. Except of course to say that it is all George Bush’s fault.

That brings me to the Kingston High School Lady Cougars. Kingston is a very poor school district located in Cadet, MO. Look, here’s where it is. It’s like Deliverance out there. When there are more burnt out 1968 Chevy trucks than people, you know it’s not exactly palm springs. Shit, I think I got a meth contact high just driving through there.

Anyway, this school district is so poor that they don’t even have money to outfit their sports teams. Do you hear me? They can’t allocate money to the very things that statistically have shown to keep kids in school and off of drugs. My future sister in law coaches the softball team. They needed to raise money in order to get bats for the team. Bats for a softball team? What a novel idea! So she asked me if I would put on a charity trivia night for them on Saturday. Of course I will do that. How do you say no to that?

Now, because I was having to help out the Lady Cougars in Cadet, MO, I was not watching the KU-OSU game on Saturday afternoon. More importantly, I was not able to sit in my lucky spot on the couch, and position my remote in the exact position that it needs to be in. Nor was I able to go with HP to our lucky bar where we have only seen one KU loss EVER (Michigan State last year in the sweet 16).   When these factors were negated, of course KU lost. KU is undefeated when I am able to affect the outcome of their games in these ways. The only other time I was not able to do this…at Tennessee.

So you can see how important my position for watching games is for KU basketball success. In summation, I absolutely do not fault myself in this case. I do not fault my future sister in law or her team. I don’t fault the Kingston K-14 school district, and I do not fault the congress. I fault Barack Obama for KU now needing to beat both KSU and Mizzou to win the outright Big XII title.

“B-b-b-b-but, Logg. I thought you said it was Sarah Palin’s fault.”

Oh right. Well, if Sarah Palin had never existed, Barack would have never won the election.

Thanks a lot Sarah.

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